CLARE WHO THE NEW LEFTY CRUMPET IS

Yesterdays narcissistic turn by Clare "Puss in Boots" Curran to use parliament to show her displeasure at a commercial decision by a sporting franchise was odd.

What was odder was when Curran, dressed in over the knee muskateer boots, black trousers and the offending rugby top was backed up in her stand by one lone member of the Labour caucus. Trevor Mallard.

Or maybe it wasnt so surprising when a few blokes on twitter expressed delight and indeed lusty thoughts for Ms Curran and those boots. A few wished they could see Ms Curran sans shirt and only in "those" boots.

But it is surprising that she was not backed up by any other labour sheilas or indeed any other blokes. After all we thought the Labour movement was all about solidarity.

So we reckon what it shows is that Mallard gallantry means he obviously really, really, really likes Clare and probably loves her in those f**k me boots.

CLARE NO TASTE OR MATES?

Clare Curran seems to be as passionate about Otago as we are about Southland. I'm a sixth generation Southlander on one branch of the family tree and 5 generations on the other.

The maroon and blue of the jersey of the amalgamated Otago Southland team was fine by us but the kermit green of the new jumper is sick making and the players are hard to see on the telly.

So we get why Curran wanted to let her feelings be known about the crass verdant hue of the new southern shirt - but why in Parliament? Its not a political issue. Its a rugby franchise issue.

She is an attention seeker at the best of times but Currans latest effort was seriously off the mark.

Suddenly, she turned an inappropriate show of patriotism to a rugby franchise in parliament into a feminist issue over parliamentary dress standards.

Now we think the dress standards in parliament are crap. Its time to move away from the class chokers for men and "business attire" bullshit for women.

But Currans posturing was all about her - not about the team or indeed dress standards.

It was all so bloody stupid and facile. And that fact was recognised by her Labour Party colleagues - not one of them walked the plank with her as she left the chamber.

Which is outstanding really - it means one of three possibilities - the old feminist cabal of Labour has finally lost the battle within the party - or maybe - Clare is simply the most unpopular person in the party or the Labour boys were waiting for her to get her kit off.

RESOLUTE IN THE NEW YEAR

A few NY resolutions we would like to to hear

Mark Solomon - " It is now time to move on and let someone else take over. "

Michael Laws "I will stop thinking about kinky sex and get a girlfriend who only likes the missionary position and of course me"

Maori leaders " We resolve to start setting some standards. No gang patches on the Marae, and at any tangi. Our mantra will be ' gang tikanga is not Maori tikanga',"

John Key "I promise to be big and ballsy and make the hard calls to grow the economy"

Bill English " The public service will feel the pain of a thousand cuts."

Judith Collins " I will do what I did last year."

Winston Peters " I will stand in Helensville for the good of the nation."

Phil Goff " I will attend every BBQ that 17 members of my caucus are planning to hold over the summer for the sake of party unity."

Cunliffe " I will roll Phil Goff because I know that I have the superior intellect and I am better at being a shifty bastard than he is."

Trevor Mallard " I will work harder at being the most obnoxious Labour blogger because its so much fucking fun."

Clare Curran " I resolve to give the world peace and love and text Helen clark every night to tell her what a wonderful job I am doing and how popular I am especially with my own caucus."

Paul Henry " I will be a bigger star than I was - take that all you dick shits"

The Brunette " We will continue to take the piss and be obnoxious, talk about sex and country living and generally make lots of noise and swear a lot.

Cactus Kate " Shag more, Drink more, and write good shit, and make squillions while travelling the world in style. "

ROUND UP

Has to be Cactus's almost scholarly take on the finance companies debacle.

Best Column has to be Frans here on her sagely advice to John Key

And Matthew Hooton's excellent take on the unlocked potential of SOE's - as a columnist he is going from strength to strength.

And we were delighted with TransTasmans excellent assessment of Clare Curran. She is an ex PR Hack but according to the literary scribes on the TT team her press releases are incomprensible. Apparently she is loathed by the Labour caucus. If she thinks we are making that up - a question for Clare. Where do you think that TransTasman gets its info? Oh yes thats right - your colleagues! Sucks to be you Clare.