French adulterer or curing your mum's Alzheimers ?

"Taxpayers are going to pick up a $10 million bill to help ensure overseas leaders have a good time here during the rugby world cup.

The guest list is yet to be announced, but Princes William and Harry are expected,along with French President Nicolas Sarkozy." - TV3

"Dr Istvan Abraham
University of Otago, Dunedin
ANGELS as a Potential Treatment for Alzheimer's Disease
$782,886
36 months" - Health Research Council

To save you pulling out your calculator that is 450 months of research. Might save a few mums and dads.

Could have been worse but Tau Henare kicked Trevor Mallard's mausoleum to touch. Well not really Tau Henare but it was too good a pun to miss.

BOB JONES - GOBSHITE.

Today we ended up having a bite to eat and a sip of wine with a few mates down at Arbitrageur...

We spied Columnist Deborah Coddington - her legal beagle bloke Colin and some old duffer whom we didn't immediately recognise, as he is a bit wizened these days, who turned out to be Bob Jones.

Anyway there was a bit of sunshine when we walked to the restaurant so we put on our favourite Pilgrim sunnies.. Treasures they are, all set about with diamantes... Lovely trailer trash specs.

Anyway we took em off and put them on the table.. In the course of the lunch some people came and went and we shifted from one end of the table for 8 to the other... Realising that forgetting our portholes was a possibility we propped them on our head so we would not lose 'em.

We were just minding our business when Jones passed our table on his way out, stopped and hissed... He had an obsessive glint in his eye.We have seen that glint before in rest homes when Alzheimic old farts get all confused and ratty.

Jones fixed his beady eyes on Busted Blonde and blathered on for a minute or so...

He reminded us of the old priest in Father Ted who used to yell out Feck..
Jones just mumbled and all we heard was mumble mumble Sunglasses! mumble , mumble sunglasses!

Like some ancient tourettes sufferer..

Coddington pushed him on gently as you would an old fart with diminished senses and sensibility.

Ratty he was, like seriously batty and ratty.

Well we find nothing socially unacceptable about propping your sunglasses on your head for safe keeping. However we do find it particularly bad form for a total stranger to stare like a mad thing, froth at the mouth and obsess over trivial issues.. We wondered if he had too much of the glorious snapper pie and got a wee bit of indigestion. Or maybe he had medication issues.

But no its much simpler than that .

Apparently the old coot has a well documented obsession with sunglasses on peoples heads and cellphones.

So all you young lovelies out there if you ever get to bed the old tosser, leave your specs at home and turn your cellphone on silent...

Otherwise he might smack your bottom..

HIJACK

This story about up and coming golfer Danny Lee and his brush with airport security reminded me of a holiday I took a couple of years back with the parents.

We were all good -but I lectured the old boy on airport security and to take everything out of his pockets. He started yapping away to the security men and they were all joshing and having a bit of fun shooting the breeze.

He walks through the security arch and the buzzer goes off - and then he puts his hands in the air and says "so I suppose this is not a good time to say hijack" The silence was long and extremely loud.

I stepped forward grabbed his arm looked the security guy in the eye and said -" You will have to excuse my father he has Alzheimer's ," Dad looked like he was going to kill me and I pinched him really hard and I pushed him in front of me. Mum looked at the security guard and nodded.

The guards looked at each other with sickly smiles and said that's okay we understand...

We had a bloody brilliant holiday in OZ but the story gets an airing from time to time.