Did the Rapture Occur at 6pm?

Posted by Lambcut

Going by TV and the internet, it does not appear that the rapture or taking up of Christians to heaven in a miraculous twinkling of an eye occurred at 6pm as predicted by US Evangelical broadcaster Harold Camping.

Having said that, I am an atheist and one can be reasonably sure that I would not be taken up in the rapture. I really can't be certain whether it took place or not. My husband is a lapsed Roman Catholic and indulges in many of the deadly sins quite regularly. He is still right here eating red meat and drinking bourbon as I write. He tells me he is horny. In fact that's one thing you can always rely on him to be. I don’t like to be judgemental but I think it excessively unlikely that he would be taken up in the rapture either. No definitive conclusions can be drawn.

It is a cold night, and I have not been outside to check if any Christians are missing. In any event, I’m not sure I know any Christians or where one might look for them on a Saturday. If you know of a Christian and can ascertain whether or not they disappeared suddenly around 6pm today, please post a comment letting us know.

Around the World at Easter

Posted by Lambcut.

The US is to begin drone strikes on Libyan targets. Games without frontiers war without tears.

Your iPhone knows where you are and it can tell other people, like the IRD, the Police and your spouse’s divorce lawyer.

24 people had themselves nailed to crosses in the Philippines, to demonstrate their Christian love.

Live on Italian TV, a little girl asked Pope Benedict to explain the suffering caused by the Japanese tsunami. Poor old Bene the Rat was buggered if he knew about that.

In Israel yesterday, WikiLeaks revealed that whilst in opposition, Benjamin Netanyahu tried to make Ehud Olmert attack Iran. Benjamin is Prime Minister now. Watch out Iran.

And in the UK, Kate Middleton’s face was found on a jelly bean. It’s a good likeness too.