WHY KAKAPO WONT SURVIVE

We always reckoned that despite the fact that Kakapo are very cool. they are very very dumb. To the point of being mentally retarded.

So it is no surprise that they have become famous for shaggin the head of a scientist. We remember when, down south they were famous because instead of shagging each other, they loved shagging a dead muttonbird..

They dont move much either, they only eat one sort of tucker and they must taste bloody fantastic. Which has limited there chances of long term survival. Easy to catch, flightless and tasty.

We have been fortunate to see them and touch them, and they really are the feathered embodiedment of true innocence. But they made our Maori genes fire up and we dribbled on contact...

MONDAY FUNDAY

Well you here some good stories when you are on tour as we currently are. You also see some pretty interesting things. More on that later.

However, some pertinent questions of the day.

How long will it take before Ralston becomes the must read blog for everyone in the media.

Who made the decision to put Key on Letterman?

Whats up with the Bill Liu scandal?

Can someone please draw a map of all Crown Land ( including DOC estate ) that does not have a high conservation value?


And finally a joke.

A woman gets rushed to hospital with a heart attack and on the operating table she has a near death experience. She see the light in the distance and there stands God.
"Bugger me" she says. "I'm dead."
"Nah sorry" says God, "you are not. I have decided that you aren't ready to come and join us in heaven yet."
" Really! How long have I got? she asks.

"Oh, 43 years and 62 days" says God..

The woman soon regains consciousness.

And she decides that she is going to make the rest of her life the best it can be.
So she books herself in to the clinic and spa next door and gets a facelift, tummy tuck, full liposuction, teeth whitened, butt and tit lift. She gets her hair done and new nails. finally she is ready to leave. She walks out the door and heads across the crossing and gets wiped out by a bus.

She finds herself back in heaven .

"Shit God," she says -" you bloody lied to me! you said I had 43 years and 62 days to live. "

"You did," said God.

"So what happened?" the woman asked.


"I didn't recognise you....."