BEST INNY GOSSIP OF THE WEEK..

Janet Wilson has the low down on how low down the Herald is likely to go under the guidance of Shane Currie.

Its delicious reading.....

SEX BOMBS

Well did we miss out on the action this week.

The sexy Welshman Tom Jones( yip we know girls who would shag him) was dished up some good ol kiwi hospitality last night from some of our mates. He dined at Zicos, the favourite restaurant of those in Wellington who love good food and service without the pretension. Then it was off to the inner sanctum of Oceanic Ltd, the home of the boys who are hard out raising funds for project Protect and and Heal - aimed at helping rebuild the community heart of tsunami ravaged Samoa.

The boys played pool with the The Voice until about 5am in the morning... So the man, some say is the sexiest septuagenarian on the planet ,kept up with the wild boys Locky and Tonis of Wellington.

That aint easy.

In fact its legend.

Damn we wished we were there..

But at least we got the pictures.

MOULDY OLD DOE

Big News! Which Labour big wig found himself with some mouldy old doe after the pre Xmas Press Gallery party ? What will this mean for broadcast bias?

PORK CHOP SUEY

You have gotta give it to Whale. He aint no slouch. He has outed some gossip bullshit in fine style.

Donna Awatere Huata it aint.

FRIDAY ROUNDUP

Questions to ponder

Who among the Auckland intellegensia has a puppy walker for the family labraspoodle?

Which hirsute and toothy marine mammal likes Christmas coming?

Who is the ex Labour party staffer who is so pissed off that he set up fake twitter accounts for Cunliffe, Jones and Cosgrove?

What the Hell has happened to H2?

How long will Shane Jones last before he walks from parliament suffering from terminal boredom?

And just where is Immigration at with the Bill Liu /Shane Jones scandal?

Which Wellington PR firm with strong Labour ties has laid off people in bulk?

Will Cactus Kate get a decent shag next time she comes to NZ?

How many more people no longer want to work for Ngai Tahu?

WHO GIVES A TOSS IN WELLINGTON?

A well known Italian Restaurant we frequent often, is owned by a lovely bloke who has had a bit of tooth trouble. His dentist refers him on to another tooth specialist for some special work. He rings the specialist who gives him the address for his appointment.

Our favourite food maestro gets to the inner city Wellington building in question at 10am in the morning bracing himself for an expensive treatment. He knocks on the door. It is opened by a woman wrapped only in a dressing gown.

"Sorry" she says "we are fully booked for the day"

The door closes. He stands in the corridor for a few minutes checking the address - it matches the number on the door so he rings the specialist, who horrified realises that he has given his new customer the wrong address . Instead he directed our man to some lovely ladies who offer executives an inner city haven that specialises in offering relief from the stresses and strains of Wellington corporate life.

Our favourite food maestro Harbours no ill will.

You may remember we took some delight ribbing Christchurch about its lunch time corporate relief service a few weeks back and now we are overjoyed to find out that when public servants find all this slashing and burning a bit much , they can get some mid city relaxation at the hands of some fair maidens.

That will make our job a lot easier.

FRIDAY ROUND UP

The UK Guardian has a nice piece on what people do and what people say they do.

65 % of all people claim to have read books they haven’t.

We have been involved in surveying the egg eating habits of New Zealanders and there is a big difference between who says they buy free range eggs and how many free range eggs are sold.

And last week MACDOCTOR wrote a blog about the trouble with the Ministry of Health stats on Smoking - it is clear from his analysis that people who say they aren’t smoking still are.

So we reckon t if you surveyed NZ’ers now about how they voted there would be many more who voted for National than actually did...

And for Gossip around the traps and other random stuff

Names in the hat to replace Leith Comer ( we think he will go before the years out)

Ø Peter Douglas.

Ø Wally Stone

Ø Parekura Horomia.

• We have heard that Wira Gardiner is scoping out replacements as we speak.
• And who is the ubiquitous Tailor of Panama Street?
• Isn’t it about time someone in the media did a history lesson on the fate of the Development Finance Corp for all the people who will be making decisions on how the govt intervenes in the money markets?
  
• Why isn’t the government folding the responsibilities of the Ministry of Womens Affairs into the Ministry of Social Development ?
• And to all the mycologists out there - why aren’t there any mushrooms in the Wairarapa ( well we have only had one feed so far)
  
• And what would happen AIG collapsed?
• and why wont Mark Solomon go and speak to each runaka on each of their marae instead of requesting a pow wow in Christchurch - does anyone else think thats a bit arrogant?
  
  

IN DEFENCE OF DOING WHATWE LIKE

Well it seems that Cactus Kate needs to research the net before she uses cute terms. Burnt Sperm apparently refers to something rather ugly.

While she has shocked her mother we apparently have pissed off some of the visitors to Roarprawn with our gossip posts. Tough. Its our blog - its called suspense and we enjoy watching people work it out or the journos who write for a living go off and do a decent story.

So Gomango - you are right its Hone and its a story the journos should chase - if he can bring together some pan party Maori initiatives then he should be applauded and he deserves more coverage for it than in our lowly little blog. we work in another industries these days so dont have the resources to devote full time to nailing the Scampi scandal. Maybe Rodney will pick it up where he left it off last year. We know that there is still plenty of material around that will keep the stench rising from the scampi scandal and we have devoted a few hours to nutting out a novel that has been triggered by the story.
So wemake no apologies for writing gossip posts from time to time. They are written to make you think and keep you in suspense and if your emotions are being ignited by them then they are successful. Remember its our blog and it you dont like it dont read it. But its amazing how many people email with the answers.
And we are not insiders. Not even close. Just mates of a lot of people who are.

So sorry boyo but the gossipy bits will surface on Roarprawn from time to time as is our want.

FRIDAY ROUND UP

What government dept had a competition to see who could say the word sperm into verbal briefings the most times? The winner managed to squeeze the word in 26 times in one day .

Which Minister has managed to seriously piss his colleagues off already with his grandstanding? and its not Brownlie

Will we see Maori get smart and create some pan party initiatives that will benefit all parties? We think so and they will be led by the least likely suspect.

What Govt Department hasn't produced any savings or efficiency plan to the government because they thought they were exempt?

And which Ministerial official is a party hero after he has identified savings of tens of millions one govt department can make. ?