LETS TALK ABOUT SEX

We were very amused to see David Farrars tittering over someone fessing they had sex in the toilet at the Green Parrot many years ago...


Torys are very, turn off the lights slip your bra and undies off under the blankies buggers.. So we get why someone like Farrar would think that sex in a restaurant loo was pretty funny..

As a mildly amusing story it got us thinking about all the weird places Busted Blonde has got down and dirty. As 50 has its steely eye upon us, there are more than a few memories.


Best place for your complexion sex - A wool press. Lanolin was fantastic on the skin but we smelt like a mutton chop for the day.

Worst itchy arse sex.. the beach.. sounds good - looks good on the movies but sand in your crack is - well a pain.

Hot shag frozen nipples sex Top of Bluff Hill on the lookout with a 40knot gale blown in your face...

Take the skin off your arse sex - Nylon carpet... Always shag on the wool shagpile.

Call of Nature sex... one of our favourites - deep in the podocarp forest with a bed of beech leaves... But watch the wandering centipedes ( see itchy arse sex)

Watching the whales sex - spa pool top of a penthouse apartment overlooking Mooloolaba harbour. Oddly inspiring...

Keep you feet warm sex - Falcon GTS with sheepskin on the roof.... We were young and hey he said he put the sheepskin there because he cared....

Hotel Balcony overlooking the Avon in Christchurch - no idea why but it was good ...

Playing hand jive under the blanket on a plane on a long haul sort of sex.

On the freezer hatch sex... Just make sure there aren't any fish scales ( see itchy arse sex)

In a Morris Minor sex - just to see if you really can - and you can. Now we wouldn't cos we couldn't.

In a 6 foot dinghy sex - lots of waves.

In the sea sex ( make sure there aren't any sea lice ) Again see itchy arse sex.

On a horse sex - you work it out...

Tied to the mast sex ooohh arrgh and blow the man down .

At your parents house with them in the next bedroom - cos it feels really really naughty...

At parliament sex - Just cos you have to but watch the buttons in the news studio..

200 foot high club sex - Because we love helicopters...

So whoever the drippy wench was that Farrar was going on about - she obviously lacks imagination....

WHO IS THE MYSTERY WOMAN?

Boy, this must have been a hell of a night.

WANKY DECISION ON NAME

A group of West Coast women who entered a netball team in the Sydney Masters Games have had to change their team name. It was Master Baiters..... The double entendre is lit with incorrect pronunciation.

So the women took a pull and and now are the Master Netters.

We dont get it. Masturbaiting is good for your health. And the Masters Games is all about promoting good health.

PC .... wankers.....

THE CUPS RUNNETH OVER DOWN SOUTH.

There was a rather vivid Southland saying that referred to the sized of ones boobies - " Shes got tits bigger than a Taranaki cow"
Always fascinated me how a Taranaki Cow could have more pendulous udders than the ones that the Southland cows sported but the reference was always about "Naki cows.
So it came as no surprise that in the deep south the Southland Times chose to run a feature about how important it is to get fitted for a bra. Now at the tender age of 13 being mandhandled by a woman ( she sported a Stephanie Mills) who seemed to really enjoy playing with my tiggers during my first bra fitting is one of the horrific memories of my pubescent years.

I was also the only one in my class who went straight to being encased in an underwire over- the- shoulder boulder- holder -bypassing all the slinky malinky models my mates adorned their poached eggs with.

And as you get older and gravity, that evil foe of women, tugs on your jugs , a good bra is a must.
And as long as the manthing of my past has gone to lesbian heaven, getting a good bra fitting advice is imperative.

So good on the Southland Times for giving the sheilas of the south the information they need to make their world a little bit more comfy.