Metlink's service is getting crappier by the day. However the 12.55 pm on a Friday is particularly prone to delays. the train arrives on the platform and the passengers get out and then it seems to sit on the platform for a while and then another engine gets hooked up and it sits there for a while more, while people are standing there are freezing their asses off . Then it backs up and lets the people on. Today it went away .. and didnt come back till around 1.10. However the Metlink info service was still telling everyone right up to 1pm that all was okay.
Friday, 29 October 2010
CHOO CHOO TRAIN DRIVER NEEDS A WEE MOE
Metlink's service is getting crappier by the day. However the 12.55 pm on a Friday is particularly prone to delays. the train arrives on the platform and the passengers get out and then it seems to sit on the platform for a while and then another engine gets hooked up and it sits there for a while more, while people are standing there are freezing their asses off . Then it backs up and lets the people on. Today it went away .. and didnt come back till around 1.10. However the Metlink info service was still telling everyone right up to 1pm that all was okay.
PICTURES PLEASE
This is the silliest story we have seen for ages... Two women, one purdy dress, one bad ass bloke and a bit of booze and lots of lawyers.
Wednesday, 27 October 2010
THE BROWN TABLE
Tuesday, 26 October 2010
THE CIRCLE OF LIFE
ROAD TOLL - FAULTY LOGIC?
Not PC has a good blog on what the causal factors of this weekends holiday road toll were.
SINGERS DISCORD MUSIC TO OUR EARS
The wee blond thing Ruth Carr who fronts for top Kiwi band Minuit should become a new urban hero.
Monday, 25 October 2010
DAFFY DUCKY
Thursday, 21 October 2010
BILL WILSON MILLION DOLLAR GONEBURGER
ITS OUR MONEY YOU JUST WASTED!
WTF????
" Throw a tanty - walk out - we understand and feel your pain.. So you go and have a day off and a wee korero with your mates and have a really good whinge and grizzle with all those of like mind.. We still love you and we will pay you for doing nothing for the day and in fact we will reward you for disrupting the lives of kids and hard working parents who have gone to work and put in a decent days labour. "
Wednesday, 20 October 2010
LIVESTOCK
The last two lambies and now Chickadee has feathers...
However, the lambies are rammies so they will be roasties and choppies..
They are called Mint and Sauce
and if chickadee turns out out to be a rooster he will be renamed KFC.
MAORI NEED TO SHOUT OUT
About Te Reo. But sorry, blaming the government for the slow down in those learning is silly - the argument is not going to wash. Seriously the Waitangi Tribunal has lost all credibility with this one. Maori themselves need to take responsibility for making the language a much more important part of their strategic future.
STUDENTS GET TO CHOOSE
Tuesday, 19 October 2010
SFO SCF INVESTIGATION IS HOTTING UP
And its NBR that the SFO is after. They want all the transcripts, tapes and documents into the dodgy saga over the ownership of the Hyatt Hotel.
GOLDEN BUBBLES
We were alerted to this little cultural gaffe by NBR - the story is behind the paywall. And we apologise for taking the piss - so to speak.
CILLA MCQUEEN OUR WEAVER OF WORDS
Diesel sounds aromatic
magenta, oxblood,
mineral smooth
any how as boronia
swivel that levers
a shoepolish lid,
key curls oily metal.
Poetry takes you apart,
puts you back different
as this day's passage
on shapeshifting water,
one to another island
swift as the stroke
of a pen the toothed strait
on the whale's path
chewed through, islets
scattered between,
text in motion
gimballed on muscling
swells, word-ware, cargo.
Bluff, April 2006
shelter safe another sun turn
flower reed or home by other
his graveyard dreams I pass
between and harbours
so shovelling petal hope to lock
our question in the former language.
She is a national treasure .
Monday, 18 October 2010
GOLD FROM DAVID JONES LOCKER TOO SHINY FOR BINT
Cactus got it right the other day when she expressed outrage at the payout given to the bint who did the cry baby thing over being " sexually harassed" by the big cheese at Ausssies mega store David Jones.
Friday, 15 October 2010
JASON WRIGHT
Today Southland will be in mourning for a young man who was making his mark on the local aviation scene.
THE TIGHT ARSED OLD COW
This is why we hate the monarchy. There overblown sense of entitlement. Their lack of understanding of normal everyday life and their pathetic miserable tight fistedness.
LESSONS FOR LABOUR
Simple PR lesson for Labour. Ignore Carter. Keep talking about him and you give him something to talk about. And the media are in ecstasy over every hissy spitty comment from either faction. Goff engaging in some puerile swipe at Carter does him no favours - its not the sort of behaviour you would expect to get from a leader.
Thursday, 14 October 2010
IS NGAI TAHU SEREPISOS NEW BESTEST FRIENDS?
HIGH NOON
Following Simon Powers announcement today that he is out to tame " the Wild West of the Internet" we reckon that there could be a bit of a stoush looming.
NGAI TAHU STILL BIDDING FOR A SLICE OF HUBBARDS PIE
Due Dillgence boys - due diligence...
Wednesday, 13 October 2010
TWO GASTRO PUBS - TWO STORIES
We have been to two very different Wellington pubs in the last week or so. One in Lambton Quay on the site of the old Paris and New Orleans now reincarnated as Keenans and the other is 3C down Chews Lane off Willis St.
GRUMPY AS F**K
Britons find being older than 52 is nothing to laugh about because that's the age when they start becoming grumpy, according to a survey.
The poll of 2,000 Britons found those over 50 laughed far less than their younger counterparts and complained far more.
While infants laughed up to 300 times a day, that figure had fallen to an average of six laughs by teenage years and only 2.5 daily chuckles for those over 60, the survey for cable TV channel Dave found.
Men were also found to be grumpier than women.
One reason for the decline in mirth might be the lack of joke-telling skills.
MISCEGENATION REQUIRED
We have a small problem of the feathered type. We have one turkey hen sitting on infertile eggs - no Turkey cock. And we have one melenisian ring neck pheasant cock who is lonely and has taken to eyeing up my red gummies with undisguised lust.
LAWS GETS THUMPED
Tuesday, 12 October 2010
ET TU BRUTE?
CULTURAL TWADDLE - MAKES US SEE RED
Te Papa has decided to abide by some cultural edict imposed by some Maori over pregnant and menstruating women not being allowed near an exhibition of some Maori treasures.
"I don't understand why a secular institution, funded by public money in a secular state, is imposing religious and cultural values on people.
"It's fair enough for people to engage in their own cultural practices where those practices don't harm others, but the state shouldn't be imposing those practices on other people."
Monday, 11 October 2010
BLOWING HOT AND COLD WITH AIR NEW ZEALAND
We see that Michael Laws is now apologising for calling the Gov General a fat bugger.. Well he is.
So are we. So what.
And Air New Zealand - do you dare apologise!
NEW ZEALAND HAS LOST ITS FUNNY BONER
Saturday, 9 October 2010
FEATHERED FRIENDS
We thought we had lost our turkey hen, but it appears she is with egg and today the lonely ring necked pheasant bloke wandered around. He is a glorious fellow. But think he need s mate
Friday, 8 October 2010
THE DEVIL IS AT HOME IN A HOUSE OF HYPOCRITES
Seems as if the priest of St Davids Church in Carterton is a little bit scared of the Freemasons.
We are no big fan of the Freemasons but these days they do more good than harm. Its all about companionship, fellowship and doing good for the community ( Shit that sounds like Christianity!)
We were bought up in the Presbyterian, Methodist and lastly the Baptist churches and apart from the predilection for the Baptists to like full immersion Baptisms ( think wet tee shirts on young girls and boys) and there isn't a hellalujah between them.
So St Davids is a Union Church - a combination of Press Buttons and Methodicals as we used to call them as kids.
Dour bastards. In fact these guys are the dourest bastards you will find anywhere. The reason that faiths like this exist is that they concentrate on the sin thing. Sermons are based on the faults of us all and fear,palpable fear, thunders down from the pulpit- Their sermons do not celebrate the goodness of the earth and it inhabitants.
Theirs is narrow church in building and in collective mind.
Crazily, this sad tale isn't about the perceived belief that Freemasons worship goats, its about the churches concerns that the Freemasons lodge is being temporarily used as the town...... Library.
Seems that the pious priest of St Davids reckons that the Freemasons lodge is all set about with Witchcraft.
That it could be bad for the books. So the church members are being asked to withdraw their library cards..
Jesus wept.
And even all the more hypocritical when so many symbols of christianity have deep roots in Paganism.
Seems the priest of St Davids is not a good scholar of his faith.
Church leaders like this bloke, do eventually do good - they help people to see the hypocrisy in religion. They are haters and wreckers.. Their flocks will dwindle.
The story ends by telling us that the Priest and his missus are leaving Carterton soon. Bloody good show.
Praise be the lord and all that.
The town will be the better for their absence.
And here is some christian mind food for the priest
We especially like this verse “Judge not, that you be not judged. Matthew 7.1
And we ask John Cromarty - can you face the scrutiny?
WAIRARAPA PARISH PUMP DRAWS DEEP FROM COMMUNITY WELL
Palmerston North has been in the news a bit as it has had a bad rap for being a boring no account city. Thing is there is a lot to be said for provincial towns.
And there is something refreshing about reading news which is not based on the cult of celebrity.
Thursday, 7 October 2010
SPIDERS AND SNAKES
MUTINY ON THE HIGH SEAS
Ha - just as we suspected - the Ady Gil was deliberately scuttled. Bethune is now publicly spewing all over the eco terrorist Paul Watson and his band of high seas hooligans.
Wednesday, 6 October 2010
CASTING STONES
- I caught some of Breakfast this morning and even though Roydon is a nice clean cut guy, it isn't really the same without madman Henryabout an hour ago ·
- Has anyone entertained the faint possibility that Henry actually thought--mistakenly but genuinely--that the current GG was foreign-born Indo-Fijian, and was simply wondering if the next guy might therefore be more of a local (anglo) yokel? It would be quite conceivable for a Fijian television host to make a similar mistake in an interview if that country's ceremonial leader happened to be an anglo-saxon.about an hour ago ·
- I wondered the same thing. Mainly cos the GG does sound a bit foreign.about an hour ago ·
- Isn't that the truth, Tina? And if we were discussing this a couple of weeks ago over a drink, one or both of us might have said the same thing, made the same mistake, and then realised soon enough that, gosh, he is NZ born after all. Would...See Moreabout an hour ago ·
- Agreed. And the more I watch what was said the more I think that was the case. He is still the best gippo presenter on tv. And if u want to see commedians that push boundaries people shud watch 7 days on tv3 on fri nites58 minutes ago ·
- Leave it out, he deserves everything he gets, actualy we all do.56 minutes ago ·
- what did Clint Eastwood say in Unforgiven after the young fella shot someone and said .. he had it comin and Clint said "we all got it comin kid"54 minutes ago ·
- bryson - thats pretty much somes it up - the most offensive pillock of the day award goes to peter dunne - the sanctimonious, slimey , uppity lillte no account mr so fricken boring. He is outraged. wow. and that from from Mr personality bypass. idjit.49 minutes ago ·
- look at how many times Mark Ellis got himself in the shit and we still love him. Well most do. If Telly got rid of the Henry's and Maccas of this world then what a boring lot we would be .. give him his 2 weeks suspension and move on. A bit like a St George player getting a grade1 charge and doing his penance Tau??49 minutes ago ·
- What a bunch of sanctimonious twats New Zealanders (real or imported) can be! And I gotta say, the office of this governor-general character might have shown a little more humour in its response, too.48 minutes ago ·
- It's a bit of a double standard but - Hone Harawira gets a free pass when he calls us white motherfuckers, and that seemed a little less tounge in cheek that anything Paul Henry has ever said. This whole hoo-ha is about people trying to do some sort of moral preening for the cameras. I also have a rule of thumb that's served me well over the years - if John Minto is for something, then I'm against it! :)
There is no way that Paul Henry should be sacked. He is often silly, puerile, outrageous, edgy but he is funny. We need funny. He said something that was probably over the top - he apologised and he lost a couple of weeks wages. The worst of it is he has to suffer the media stalking him for a few days.
Despite him being all the above and despite the GG comment being over the top - we don't want to see him gone. He is simply the most engaging commentator we have on any broadcast medium. Marcus Lush is quirky, Willy and JT set out to be really provocative and their programme is no place for the feint of heart or soft of epidermis but Henry is still the best.
And we suppose we support Henry ts because we ourselves are known for being particularly garrulous , often down right insensitive, occasionally funny and always opinionated. And we have offended many people over the course of our life. Sometimes we regretted it sometimes we didn't.
So we think that it is totally absurd for the holier than thou brigade to don their cloak of righteousness and call for Henry's sacking.
Fuck off we say. Yes Henry is a dick, yes he is often a purile idiot, yes he is offensive and what he said about the GG was cringeworthy. But he has been punished. End of story.
And for all the holier than thou people who have condemned Henry - keep yelling out your outrage - - it will give us time to research all the pathetic shite you have spouted.