Tuesday, 6 April 2010


We are starting to feel very sorry for Tiger Woods. Hell he might have been as pious prat  who hasn't lived up to the legend  but he has faced his demons and its time for him to get back to doing what the world wants most from him - good golf.

We are disgusted by the antics of the attention seeking bevy of mistresses who are milking the Tiger phenomenon - for all its worth.

As for Joslyn James  - she wants an apology  - well bless her victoria secret undies. Why does she deserve one?  She seems to think that its because Tiger lied to her. Yip  - he did but she forgets that the relationship was based on a false premise as well. She was living a big fat  lie  one she was fully aware of.

Here are Busted Blondes  rules for mistresses.

  • Never forget you are just the mistress.  
  • You made the decision to be the mistress - no one forces you to. 
  • Being a mistress demands a bit of theatre - that means the situation has its own unreality - so being told that he loves you is just a nice line in the stage production that is the "affair"
  • You need to realise you fill a gap  in his life  - but he does not want you  to take over his life. 
  • Take all the gifts and trinkets you can get - its all you will end up with in the end.
  • He loves the thrill of the naughtiness of it. Most men harbour secret dirty girl fantasies.
  • A couple of nights here and there does not constitute mistress status - it means you are just a root - maybe a good root but just a root nonetheless. 
  • Staying the night does not indicate love - most men like morning sex - he knows he needs to stay to get it. 
  • Flowers jewellery and chocolates  do not constitute love  - you give gifts to those who give good service and it shows you are a nice person  - sort of the international koha.
  • Men like cuddles - they do not mean love. Dont confuse affection for love.
  • Men want it all - so they wont leave status and respect for a good shag.
  • Mistresses do not get respect - they get gratitude.
  • If he leaves his wife he wont end up with you  - that will make him feel too  guilty  - he will find another lover who wasn't involved in the deception. 

Final rule of mistressology - it will end in tears sooner or later - relationships on any level based on betrayal and lies are always doomed.



Cactus Kate said...

I think you have overanalysed it BB.

Joslyn couldn't give a shit about an apology, she just wanted the $10 million payout that Tiger's Number 1 was rumoured to have got. That's all. Ditto for the rest. He picked hookers/waitresses/dancers. Hookers are all about the cash.

She has read about all the other loot and gifts the other girls apparently got, flights, hotels etc and now is just pissed off she didn't get that as well. Fair cop, she's got an agent (the same as the one who allegeedly got $10 mill) and will now extort it out in embarrassment.

Tiger only apologises it seems by writing bloody big cheques.

www.alphabetasport.com said...

Cactus said just what I was gonna say

Trademark said...

Dear Sir/Madam,
Re: Copyright Infringement/Mistressology

My name is K Elliott and I am the owner of the Trademark 'Mistressology'. The application for this mark was made on 19th Feb 2009 on my behalf by my attorneys Lockhart and Hastings who may be contacted for verification.

I am the author of the forthcoming book entitled Mistressology and am requesting that you change the title of your post so the public do not confuse my work with yours. I have today reported this matter to blogger.com (piracy and abuse).
I appreciate in advance your co-operation

K. Elliot
Mistressology (c)

Anonymous said...

Trademark: I think you should regard the use of your "word" on this blog as early publicity for your allegedly forthcoming book which you fail to describe as fiction or non-fiction! I'm serious about this. It would, I suspect, be in your very best interests to get the book on the shelves pronto!


Oswald Bastable said...

All publicity is good publicity and ALL writers need as much as they can get.

The problem is seldom having your work nicked. It's getting it noticed.

or is that what this is REALLY about...

petal said...

I propose a "mention Mistressology" day, where we all use the word in a blog posting or comment.

Except in the UK of course.

Steve C said...

"Mistressology (c)"

Why are you indicating copyright on a word? That is simply not possible.

Regarding your trademark, in what jurisdiction did you file for the trademark? Please provide relevant links.

If you have not filed for, and been awarded, the trademark in either the country this blog post was written in, or the country the blog site is hosted in, your trademark has no bearing or relevance at all.

Learn the rules before you try to use the internet, troll.