Tuesday, 10 March 2009

Lambcut's Taser Awards

The latest issue of New Scientist Magazine refers to a new Taser that can be fired from a 12-gauge shot gun. Certain individuals, institutions and events seems to sit up and beg to be candidates for target practice during the development of this device. Today's candidate nominees are:

  1. Job losses. Blue Mountain Lumber Mill in Tapanui has announced that 60 staff must go. Lambcut knows the little town well and it won't easily recover from such a blow.
  2. The Hamilton woman who its reported tried to bite police that were assisting Council staff trying to remove her dogs.
  3. Labour Party President Andrew Little who spoke at a National Press Club luncheon at Parliament today. He seemed a pleasant enough fellow and he had quite interesting material. But he took it and wrecked it with such a staggeringly boring delivery that Lambcut nearly lost the will to live listening to him. He must have some other less obvious talents to have gotten where he is. Speaking clearly isn't one of them.

Further nominee suggestions are welcome.

No comments: